Ode to the Scofields

We love you.
We will miss you.
We don't want you to go.
God loves you.
God has goodness for you.
I still don't want you to go.
See you this summer.
Still don't want you to go.
Be safe.
Thanks for being my first friend.
Be hopeful.
Thanks for having hilarious kids.
Be patient.
Thanks for all the tattoos.
Be loving.
I still don't want you to go.

Do You Office?

Office is a new verb in my vocabulary. So, do you? Well, do you do it like this? A few of us may have gotten carried away celebrating Jim and Pam's wedding. You may notice my wardrobe change, but there is no way I could fit cake into that dress. I could hardly breathe.

Yes, well, you should. We had a real wedding cake, champagne,a couple of wedding dresses and a bride's maid. We also had one couple who didn't dress up. They filled the role of that one redneck uncle you have to invite in case he provides a Funniest Home Video moment.

Bodily Harm Update

Walter the mysterious nugget is as big a mystery as ever. No test has shown anything abnormal. I feel satisfied enough not to worry, but frustrated that my muscles all round him hurt. It could be completely unrelated or he could still in fact be an incredibly tight muscle. Possible. Also, CAT scans and the things they inject make you feel like you pee right there in the middle of everything, but you don't. Well ,I don't. YOU might.

Dr. Aric the Chiropractor said it seems as though my body is treating my rib muscles as though they are injured. He doesn't think they are because all the tests say they are healthy. It doesn't change the way my brain is viewing them though. SO, he has an admittedly painful therapy planned to stretch the muscles to keep them from being inflamed. While I am not at all excited about the money or the pain that will go into this, I am hopeful and looking forward to no longer being in pain.

Unfortunately, that all has to wait because while my ribs are incredibly inflamed and I had my cough due to cold, I broke a rib. At least one. That's all I know. Also, that it hurts like a swear word that rhymes with trucker. Oh, and what's the most miserable thing to do with a broken rib you ask? Sneeze. Holy Cheezits. It hurts.

Substitute Teachers and My Need to be Loved By All

So many days when someone doesn't like me, I figure they have real issues. Like, there is one lady who decided she was so offended by something I wrote on my blog, but not brave enough to tell me what it was, she just sent me rotten hate mail to express her opinions. Pretty much I think she is lame and a weenie. Toughen up, I say! Also, you should only read blogs based solely on facts if you don't want my opinion. Clearly there is something wrong with that lady, and I am wonderful. She swears she no longer wants anything to do with my blog, so she probably won't be reading this wondering if I am talking about her. probably.

Anyway, today a little boy who usually loves me decided to play the punk card and landed himself in the principal's office. Now, those of you who know me know I don't shirk at disciplining my kids, nor anyone else's kids- neighborhood kids, school kids, grocery store kids-whatever. WHAT? If I were a black lady, you would expect it!

Because he was most likely threatened by the principal not to show his cutie little face again today, this boy was beside himself when I said to head back up to the office. I tried every form of discipline a teacher can pull, which frankly isn't much. Especially when I prefer to give a little backhand of love to my kids when they are exceptionally mouthy, which he was. When he started spitting on all the kids in the class I drew the line in the sand.

He left not liking me. Not liking me even a tiny bit. And, I find myself wanting to go find him and make him love me. sigh. It's different with kids, I have decided. I actually care if they like me.

Conversations With My Kids

Mini-van conversations are the best. Those of you who do not own one, will not believe me, but tis true. For instance, today on our way home from dropping off taller children at youth group, I began asking Eli about the book he is reading, Bud, Not Buddy. Here is a tidbit:

Eli: I am at the part where that guy picks him up in his car.

Me: ooh, I like that part. Do you think that guy is going to be nice, or do you think he is rotten and trying to kidnap Bud?

Eli: He is trying to kidnap him.

Me: nope. He ends up being a really nice guy.

Addison: I don't like kidnaps. I like to stay awake. Well, if I am tired, MAYBE, but mostly I like to stay awake.

Me: good to know.

Layla: ahahahaa Addison, that doesn't even make any sense.

Conversations like these do not take place OUTside of mini-vans.

Work Schmerk

With student teaching coming up, I am supposed to be racking up as many subbing days as I possibly can. The problem is I still want to just be the mom. If I could stay home regularly I would spend my at home days differently. I could stop feeling like I am always trying to catch up.

breakfast in front of my fireplace, kids getting ready all around me

(if I am dreaming) someone else will take my kids to school

I get all the school stuff ready for homeschooling

do my dishes while Sam and Addie play with their morning centers

I would decide I don't feel like getting dressed and I would snuggle with my kiddos and watch a movie

This would be a morning of happiness for me. Also there would be coffee that didn't make my belly ache and my husband would be available every time I wanted a smooch, as he usually is on his days off.

Oh, and this would be my fireplace.

In A Funk

After hearing my brother speak on what captivates us this morning at church, I feel like I have figured out what captivates me and keeps me from God: nothing. Not nothing as in nothing keeps me from God and I am the best Christian any of you will ever meet. More like the Great Nothing from The Never Ending Story. ATREYU!
I feel the weight on my shoulders, but I can't see it. When I try to exam it closely, it alludes me. Like one of those little gray spots you catch every once in awhile in your sight line. You see it, but you can't look directly at it. I can FEEL it, but I can't quite put my finger on what is keeping me feeling secluded. Sometimes people call this being in a funk. It's what I would call it. It's in everything I do. I feel floundering, which is insane, because I feel as though I have plenty to focus on and accomplish, but the second I try to grab hold of something and look it in the eye, it's gone again. I don't know what more to say about it.

"Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, small, but valuable. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void."~Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kelly

What are YOU doing today?

So, this morning I get to fast and drink grossness called contrast. THEN, I get to go into the imaging place and get a CT-Scan of my innards: organs, muscles, bones. Jealous much? Don't hate the playah... I will let you know what they say about Walter, the twin growing within me. Erin Reed, are you reading this? Call my house. Or email me at created1@charter.net and give me an email to contact you. sheesh. hope YOUR innards are well. Praying praying.

Noah the Nerd

My family is living with me. My brother, his wife, and two boys. This is Noah's back. I wrote him this letter.

Then, when I wouldn't tell him what I wrote, he tattled on me to his mother. She wrote him this letter.