Right Now

I thought I would balance my flashback post with a current events.

Right now I am:
very sleepy.
Should be completing my homework or sleeping.
Having a sleepover.
Excited to be staying in the Minnie Mouse room at the Cross Family B&B in Sacramento.
Wondering if I will feel Minnie Mouse staring at me all night like she is right now.
Hoping I get to sleep a little.
Praying for confirming dreams for me and my husband.
Proud of my brother for stepping into the gifts God intended for him since he was little.
So grateful for my giftings.
Overwhelmed that God is answering prayers and giving me avenues to use those gifts.
Honored to know the Cross family.
Thrilled to be working with Jessica the pot stirrer.
So encouraged on my road less traveled.
Outtie like a belly button.

Speaking of Beef Jerky

(Yes, I realize the title has zero to do with my post,

but I couldn't come up with a different segue,

and one time a child neighbor said those very words

when we weren't at all speaking of beef jerky.

This has obviously affected my life greatly.)

One second ago I was working on homework.

One minute ago I was recounting how much junk food I have eaten in the last two days.

It wasn't pretty.

One hour ago I was at the grocery store with Miss Layla Grace enjoying her company and realizing for about the hundredth time how beautiful she is.

One day ago I was visiting The Man at the fire station wishing

he could be home for Father's Day, but grateful to God that he has a job to go to.

One week ago I thinking of Africa and wondering how God wants me to love all things African.

One month ago I was thanking God for confirming how little I want to work away from my children and counting the days until the evils of student teaching were over. I was also walking down the graduation aisle blubbering like a girl.

One year ago I was fighting a nervous breakdown as we faced what we thought was a pending layoff. I was addressing the City Council members picturing my self punching our mayor in the neck. I am better now. You can trust me with your children again.

One decade ago I was a mother of one little peanut wishing so much that I lived in Reno, that my husband would grow a beard and listen to country music, and that God would give us more children. BINGO.

Tid Bits

I have so little to say and so much time-wait reverse that. I have LOADS to share, but I am on the last chapter of my incredibly tiresome teacher work sample which contains no less than 1/3 of my blood and a few hours of my tears. College Schmollege. Okay, I don't mean that, but these big projects schedule at the end of the four grueling years can wear a person right out.

Summer is in full swing and we have been lazy, oooh boy! I was going to transition us from life full speed ahead to a relaxing summer, but sometimes you just need to jump in. We spent a week watching nonsense television, running errands together, cheering on The Man while he finished the back patio, cleaning, decluttering, and getting on track in the house. My house is getting pretty. My closets are cleaned, my cabinets are organized, and my pantries are decluttered (that is NOT a euphamism). I mean to say there is nothing wrong with my pantries...never mind.

We gave the kids a Christmas present called the 12 months of Christmas. Each month we spend time together being a purposeful family. This month we took the kids on a shoe shopping spree. I got silverware. I was thrilled as I have wanted new, REAL, silverware since we got married.

I have felt challenged lately to live all of my life with more purpose. I do a lot. I accomplish much. I can make a list of it all and it will be full! The regularly missing element is my purpose. So, we are being a purposeful family.

Currently we are praying about how to give to the Redeemer House. Hands of Hope Missions is heading there in the spring of 2011, and we will be a part of that mission; we just do not know in what capacity just yet. For now, we are supporting them in prayer and choosing to listen to live a more purposeful life. Wanna join us? Who knows, maybe you have been created for such a time as this. I know I have.

Roads Less Traveled

Sometimes you know what the plan is.

Sometimes you think you know what the plan is.

Sometimes you tell people you know what the plan is knowing the whole time

you don't really know what the plan is.

And, sometimes you thought you knew the plan, but then people talk,

and God makes the tiniest wind blow, and as you look to enjoy the breeze,

you turn your head off of that self-determined path long

enough to see that road less traveled.

Sometimes you follow that path-rarely, but sometimes.

And then your life is changed forever.

The devil's greatest weapon is confusion.

We can become so confused in life that we forget to use the

common sense God gives us to focus on him.

His second greatest weapon is all things that sparkle.

If the devil can put enough sparkly things in front of us,

we will chase after those suckers like mice in a cheese maze.

But, let's face it. Cheese is stinky. Cheese isn't what God has planned for us.

I challenge you to avert your eyes from the sparkly.

Turn your gaze just long enough to see that road not taken,

enjoy the still small breeze, and take a step outside of the maze.

It's in this place that we begin to see the iceberg tips of miracles

God is conducting at every step.

It's difficult to see miracles when we are staring at the sparkly.

The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth; 5

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same, 10

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back. 15

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood,

and I— I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

She

This was Addison a year ago.

Now:

She is hilarious.

She has straighter hair, which makes me sad.

She is beautiful, not just cute.

She is willing to smile at our pastor. This is a big change.

She is graduating from preschool. Sigh.

She is incredibly smart.

She is able to read, add, write, and figure out much on her own.

She needs me less.

She makes me sad and happy all at the same time because

She is growing up.

Addison in Rare Form

Seriously, this girl gets weirder by the minute. Yesterday, her big brown eyes met me at the door full of tears of rejection and she claimed no girl anywhere would play with her! I asked if she wanted to come with me to run errands. She was instantly better and my eyebrows furrowed as I realized I was just duped by a five year old. First stop- Home Depot.

Scene- Garden center check out line. Beautiful weather, birds fluttering and chirping, flowers and shrubberies setting a melancholy scene.
Addison's voice cuts through everything: Mommy, why DID you take your shirt off in the car?
Mommy: (eyes wide stares blankly at clerk and mumbles) I had a tank top on underneath. :/
Clerk: hysterical laughter
Mommy: Thanks Addison. Sigh.

Second and last stop for the rest of our lives- Walmart.
Scene- Walmart check out line (sensing a theme?) Well, there isn't anything pretty about the inside of Walmart, but it was surprisingly quiet. (Of course it was.)
Addison: (looks at her mother, hands up as if she were surrendering) Sheesh Lady! You aren't even my mother. You are a stranger. Stranger Danger!
Mommy: blink. blink.
Addison: (laughs maniacally)
Mommy: (after realizing people are looking) Addison! You can't say that!
Addison: (nonchalantly) Why? What's the big deal?
Mommy: (Eyes wide) THE BIG DEAL IS THAT THE POLICE WILL TAKE ME TO JAIL!
Addison: (maniacal giggling then muttering under her breath as if she were threatening to say it louder) stranger danger. stranger danger (and she continues muttering all the way out to the car).
Mommy: Thanks Addison. Sigh.

Goodbye forever.

Jesus is My Huckleberry

A recent (completely asinine but possibly true) announcement of someone I know having TB got me thinking of the movie Tombstone (obviously. When all of your thoughts come together only after relating the situation to a movie, you will understand me more. "So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?" This is me with movies)

I digress. The recent events and conversations I have had with my family, friends, children, co-workers and the out right miracles God has been conducting around me have me thinking that God really is interested in my life. He says it, I know-life to the fullest right? But I am so ignorant and unable to minutely grasp God's word that I shrug it off as helpful and encouraging advice for you, her, him, they, them..fill in the proper pronoun, just make sure it is describing someone else and not me.

The Man
The Man's job TWICE and now possibly three times.* see miraculous story below.
My family
My family's new church and every single thing you can imagine they would need to start a church just a hop skip and a jump from my house including (and especially) great people. People I will cry over when they are gone (okay so I did a little already).
Then my friends and the miracles of their adoption.
And my friend Jessie who God has spiritually thunked on the forehead and is now forever changed.
The miracle of me graduating. Because remember when I have five children? God is clearly at work here.
And now God is stirring pots I didn't even know I had inside me.

My pastor said he has cried much these past months. I concur and I raise my hand and say "I get you brother." Of course I could chalk it up to stress, emotionality (no, I do not know if that is a word), or the fact that I have clearly been in over my head for the previous four months. But that is just a fractional part of it. God has been moving, and my puny human brain cannot receive it all, so I cry.

I am beside myself with excitement at what I think God is attempting in my life. I have had such a long season of unmoving. Not by choice. My choice is to be superwoman, neglect my family (because let's face it, when we try to be superwoman the most important people get left in the dust), and try to do it all! I am so glad God reveals his choices to me. His choices hurt, and they are often unnatural, but they are always right. I just have to be brave enough to put one step in front of the other. Maybe my superwoman boots will come in handy after all.

Pray for our family. We need the support and agreement and clarity and this list could go on forever. Keep it simple. Say something like,"please give The Man and his lady friend clarity."

*Mike was supposed to be laid off a few weeks ago. Many of you were praying for us. Here is how it went down. The list came out with nine names. The department said get ready, so we prayed, took a day to snuggle. They said, they said...I hate They. Lay off day came and the phone calls were made, only we didn't get one. Mike called and They said, as casually as if we called to say we left our socks at your house last night, "oh, we only had to lay off 8. We promoted one guy, and someone retired. You are safe. See ya." I am sure they meant to say sorry for the stress we may have caused you while you waited hours and hours and hours and hours for this phone call. Awesome. And I do not mean that facetiously.

I Am

happy to be a wife.

a good mom.

not extraordinary.

quite extra ordinary.

not finished with college even though I walked on Saturday.

finished with college in 65 days from today.

three days away from being finished with student teaching.

wishing the days would zoom a little faster.

tired of having a stressed out belly, out of place neck and back and ribs, and a near constant pain in my right kidney.

wondering if there is an over zealous organ donor reading right now.

apparently a singer/songwriter type of musician.

anxious to catch up with fake Japanese friends soon.

choosing to look for ways to serve the people around me.

starting with my husband.

incredibly thankful for this past weekend with friends, family, and a near pants off dance off at the bowling alley with Laverne, Lenny, Squiggy, Thebabysitter, Thebartender, Thephotographer, and Theweddingcrasher.

thrilled that I was asked to make a guest appearance as Professor Trelawny this Friday in my son's class.

even thrilled-ier that he has no idea.

jealous I did not think of turning my classroom into Hogwarts first.

still completely giggly that some friends of mine realized they were at the wrong wedding only after dropping their gift off at the gift table, got drinks from the bartender, had their picture made by the photographer, and the bride was walking down the aisle. SO GREAT!!

exhausted from working (up at 0530, dragged out of bed by 0600, out the door at 0700, home by 1600 to do more work until I fall asleep in my bed whilst finishing said stupid homework until no earlier than 2200.

unsure if military time makes things seem better or worse.

thinking worse.

Seriously, These Are My Kids

I will be so grateful when I get to be home with them again. This summer is going to be amazing even if the only thing we do is nothing. In fact, that will probably be the best part- the nothing. As long as we do nothing together, I am looking forward to it.

Jessica, thank you again for being such an amazing photographer. See you in Reno in no time :D

Spring

Spring is trying to break through here in Reno. We have been getting two or three days of rain, sleet, wind, and snow, which turns into sunny 70s for the rest of the week. I love it. The cold weather makes grading papers and endless hours of homework more bearable. Our flowers and trees are doing so well with the rain water, which goes to show how gross tap water is. I think my kids are even growing because of the sunshine!





Aren't these pictures perfect likenesses of the kids? Artistic geniuses I tell you!


Sam added his nose. He said he wanted to be like Pinocchio.

I traced Addison and she added her details including her hair. Awesome.

My front yard flowers. So pretty.

A Quick Catsup

Please don't get me started on the ketchup/Catsup fiasco. I have no answers.)

Here is a quick look at the life in the Brewer household over the past few months to make up for the lack of blog posts. Please forgive me my slacking. As soon as student teaching is through, I will be back to writing. For now, please accept these pictures as a token of my love.

Eli and Layla Grace were baptized at our church. Obviously I cried.

Addison became a hair dresser and decorated Ms. Jessica up real real nice.

We took the kids ice skating for our family day. In addition to Eli's hair being amazing, ice skating with five children is hilarious.

Eli got a haircut and was given some recreation clothes. Thanks again Harrisons.

We got a new jungle gym. These are the best sort of hand-me-downs.


Eli turned 9 and decided if Jeffro Harrison can wear pink, so can he.

Layla Grace turned 8. Sigh.

Mike is now 34 and still a fire fighter :)

And Eli allowed his sisters to convince him that he would look great as a girl. Double sigh.

And I picked up my cap and gown. CAN YOU STAND IT!! The excitement is killing me!

I realized my kids are all very weird. Again, I did not pose them. This is just who they are.
We took the kids bowling for family day. And I thought ice skating was entertaining!
And Miss Addison lost her first tooth. There are 6 more wiggling their way out at any second. No kidding. Someone pass me an apple!

Thank you for hanging with us through these crazy times. I miss being here. See you soon. Five weeks and counting!

God is So Good

My Husband was shown the real deal of God's grace this week. A memo went out showing a list of names of people up for lay off with the fire department, in order by random drawing. Out of the 18 people on the list, My Husband was slated as number 9. Mr. In the Middle. If they laid off any number less than 9, he would be safe. The memo stated that 9 were to be laid off. Then you prayed. Then we prayed. There was much prayer. So many of you encouraged us, hugged us, and reminded us to keep our chins right where they should be. God reminded me that I fully trusted him when we got this job, so I should fully trust him this day as well.

We made precautions where possible, did the snuggling and healthy denial we discussed earlier, and then a new memo was sent out. This new memo said 8 firefighters were to be laid off. Eight. Just eight. Just one shy of My Husband. Just one shy so God is able to show how close he is holding us. Right there, see us? We are right there in his hands.

God is so good. Thank you all for your prayers again.

Pray

Lay off letters are scheduled for delivery tomorrow. There has been some discrepancy on whether or not Mike is on the list. We are snuggling, praying, and believing in God today the same as we did when Mike got this job. Pray.

Snuggling

This weekend, my husband and I spent time together in healthy denial.
We shipped the kids off, pulled our mattress into our living room, and snuggled.
He is due to get his official lay off notice this week, but we have already seen the list, and he is on it. Instantly, I got a belly ache, and then I prayed.

I have felt a strong desire to snuggle lately. I have snuggled with my husband plenty, but my desire is to snuggle up with God so he can serve as a protective bubble. I cannot mentally take more right now. The devil thinks he has us licked (iykwim), but he doesn't. I am choosing to snuggle with God. Right there, in his hands.
Michael is an unbelievable husband, a hardworking firefighter,
and an even more amazing father. God doesn't forget people like that,
and we are choosing to believe God is going to work miracles through our situation.
God is bigger than the lay off lists...also, the boogey man. So, suck it satan.

What I Would Look Like if I Were a Drinker

This picture pretty much sums up how I feel about life right now.
An "amazing" "song writer" once put my feelings into words, with 83
stanzas of "I am soo tired." I would like to declare her my spokes
person for the next 7 weeks. Seven weeks and I am done student
teaching forever.

When Student Teaching is All Finished

I think I need a list of things to look forward to
and a place to keep all the ideas I have to pass on
during this crazy time. Here goes:

Blow bubbles with Sam and Addie

Play with kids at the park

Go out of town for a night with The Man

Sleep in

Sleep in

Sleep in

Sleep late

Shower for longer than 10 minutes for the heck of it

Re-organize my school closet; it's getting cluttery

Make a delicious and not at all convenient

Re-read my Twilight series--yah, I said it

Find a movie a month to go to with a friend

Date my husband weekly

paint my toes (although, this is something one of you
who love me could do now while I am working on homework, js)

yard work

paint my house-just on the inside

run nonsense errands with my husband and two littlest children

Spend more time with Rosalie

get a new tattoo-something involving my husband whom
I have now been married to for 14 years

there will be more-count on it. I am sick of being a
working mom. Highly overrated.

Take a Second and Give a Book

Nothing frustrates me more than running into nearly grown
children who cannot read. Really?
No teacher/parent/neighbor/friend/SOMEone came
along at some point and decided it really IS important
for this person to know how to read? Really?
Give free books

Just click and they give. So simple.
Won't you be a part of bringing a book to a child?
DO IT. I am going to count 5..4..3..2..1!
Do it or I will have you arrested.

Yawn.

Oh, how I wish this was the truth. I am going to sleep. Then, tomorrow, I will finish week five of student teaching. YAAAAAAAAWN with a really big mouth.

Inspiration from Africa

Follow this story of adoption, family, and what God is capable of from the view of a very talented photographer.

http://www.speckledbirdart.com/blog/

*photo by Reverb

Amazingly, at the same time, another blogger is also in Africa doing life changing work with Compassion International. Both of these people are inspirations to me.

http://www.thisisreverb.com/

Ode to The Reeds

Friends from the past

are always a blast

They give me flack

and show a crack.

Dan-O