This Where the Nonsense Turns to Makesense

..A large family working to perfect our sweet skills: Loving others, making an impact, parenting on purpose, living simply, and embracing sarcasm.

Thursday, June 16, 2016

I Took My Daughter to Get Her First Tattoo: I am that mom

There are hundreds of things we say no to with our kids:
Don't touch
Don't eat that
No jumping
No sitting
No standing
Don't lick that
Don't miss your curfew.
I remember when my kids reached the year of less than obedient threes. I caught myself saying no to everything, even if my answer to them could have been a yes. 

When my now adult 18 year old daughter said she wanted a tattoo, I didn't hesitate. "I'll pay for it if I can come with you." A year long conversation ensued. 

We talked about hasty decisions I've made when much prayer was needed. We talked about what tattoos mean to her. Is it just something pretty? Will you always feel in favor of tattoos? 
Do your tattoos need to tell a story or can they just be pretty? 
Are there jobs or situations you could find yourself in that might not welcome your tattoos? 

How about when you're a missionary in another country and you want people to listen to your message? What if their culture doesn't allow them to look past your tattoo? 
Where will you place it? Are you for or against face tattoos? No, that isn't an obvious answer. 

We talked about WHAT is a good idea for permanent and what should only be drawn in sharpie marker. Winnie the Pooh? Hmm. The face of your first boyfriend? Please say no. Mom in a big red heart. Probably. 

She was going to get a tattoo. It wasn't a question. I didn't get a say in it because she is a grown up woman baby, and she can think for herself. I WANT her to think for herself. But I don't have to just step aside. 
She's my girl. I love her and she respects me as her momma. We've worked to have lines of communication. Once we've talked, she can take my words or leave them. But I've done my part. I've loved her enough to brooch the tricky subjects. No glossing. Enough with the glossing. 

She drew these flowers herself. I'm so proud of this beautiful girl. 

Ps. Thanks for not getting these on your face. 


Anonymous said...

❤️❤️❤️ It is a beautiful tattoo and I'm sure not an easy "pill to swallow" at first for you, but good discussion, choice made and it turned out beautifully.
Ps- a moko in New Zealand (face tattoo) is reserved for only the most highly regarded and important people.. Gods chosen ones who are the leaders of thier whanau... So I agree that his question is not a simple yes/no... Cause I'm a YES lady... Maybe just not for me. ��

shontell said...

Thank you, Mo. I love that cultural information, too! Might not tell her yet haha!

anthony beas said...

That is so awesome, I took my daughter to get her first tattoo it was a rose for her middle name Vivien Rose.

shontell said...

Anthony, that's awesome! And funny!! Our girls have the same middle name. Thanks for stopping by! It's good to see you.