black magic woman...sorta

okay so i feel i have been perfectly honest with you all about my blackheartedness. i am mean. i am that old lady at the end of the block that everyone is scared of. okay not exactly cause she isnt usually hot, BUT i just feel like i have a hard time mothering other's kids. let me rephrase. i love them plenty, but when they are crying over really dumb stuff i just want them to get over it cause honestly what's crying gonna help? ZILCHO!
like this afternoon. i am babysitting three little kids for the month of september as they are a product of track schooling and need someone to make sure they dont burn down the house while their mother continues to provide the money to pay for said house. and on she goes. we finish school, the kids leap and bound to play in the front yard and notice their front door is actually wide open. doggy missing.
my first thought " aaw, suck!" followed by an eyeroll (hidden from the children of course)
so i investigate and find that, yes, tis true. the front door is wide open and the dog has gone to find that greener grass and probably (because he is now a free male)... a piece.
my second thought "how the heck did their door get open? they must have left it open this morning." and then i add lazily as i watch them in their living room from the front yard"or maybe some crazy person has been tapping their phones and found out that i was planning on watching the kids, learned their schedule, and has now snuck into their house, stole the dog and broke their blinds. maybe i should tell the kids to stay out...hmmm..." then out loud i yell "KIDS!!! what are you thinking. get out of that house. we dont know why that door was open!!!"
then i explain that i am currently in charge of 7 kids and cant take a drive through the neighborhood to look for their dog(YAH, THATS why i wont do it), but that their own mother will be home shortly and will, i am sure, will not rest until Lobo is safely at home.
i head inside to check my emails. and unlike our apparently unpopular pastor..i have a few emails waiting. then i notice the girls are crying.
my third thought " sigh." then a quote from the Great White Hype "laugh and the world laughs with you. cry and i will give you something to cry about you little bastard."
ROFL!! i catch myself from giggling out loud just in time to pass along a hug and explain to the kids where doggies go when they get run over. AHAHAAA!! just joking. but luckily mom pulls up and wisks them away and they are now off looking for doggie..ope, they are back with and empty truck bed. maybe it was a crazy person. hmm. interesting.
ope! off again. maybe the dog called and left them a message.
my kids thoughts on the whole thing are just cracking me up-

eli-maybe someone stole him
girls --wahh. dont say that eli, it makes me cry
eli-::shrug::well it is true. but maybe we can borrow a gun from matthew ( alittle boy down the street that supplies our boys with the toy guns) and kill whoever took your dog
me -HEEY! stop talking like that!
layla-i dont like this story very much.
me- neither do i. change the subject
eli-i am a good wrestler.


convo #2
izzy-maybe he ran away to their school. courtney said he is probably at her school, that is why they are in such a rush.
layla-or maybe he ran away to somewhere better, like McDonalds.
eli-HE CANT EVEN FIND MCDONALDS LAYLA!