This Where the Nonsense Turns to Makesense

..A large family working to perfect our sweet skills: Loving others, making an impact, parenting on purpose, living simply, and embracing sarcasm.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

In A Funk

After hearing my brother speak on what captivates us this morning at church, I feel like I have figured out what captivates me and keeps me from God: nothing. Not nothing as in nothing keeps me from God and I am the best Christian any of you will ever meet. More like the Great Nothing from The Never Ending Story. ATREYU!
I feel the weight on my shoulders, but I can't see it. When I try to exam it closely, it alludes me. Like one of those little gray spots you catch every once in awhile in your sight line. You see it, but you can't look directly at it. I can FEEL it, but I can't quite put my finger on what is keeping me feeling secluded. Sometimes people call this being in a funk. It's what I would call it. It's in everything I do. I feel floundering, which is insane, because I feel as though I have plenty to focus on and accomplish, but the second I try to grab hold of something and look it in the eye, it's gone again. I don't know what more to say about it.

"Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, small, but valuable. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void."~Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kelly

1 comment:

noel said...

Great, great quote. I just love that movie. One of my all time favs and I just love you as well. Thanks for coming to be my friend at lunch the other day.